Friday, November 25, 2011

self-justification

So many things on my mind lately

So many events and tasks to be completed

The main event was my sister’s wedding

Alhamdulillah it went all smoothly

It’s the end of the year and just when I thought the drama on fb has ended…it started all over again…the fact that someone called me “asshole” do hurt my feelings and it bothers me for a minute or two…for a split second I wanna announce to the world what really happened but luckily I am able to rationalize myself and not to do the same thing.

This morning I thought about self-justification and I realized that it is more about consoling our own self, rather than telling people the truth so that they can stop judging you negatively.

I mean people can judge you anyway they like. You can’t tell them to like you or hate you. They see you as who you are. Although how people see you will definitely affect your life (especially your emotion) but by the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter.

Nobody knows you more than you know yourself. You can tell others lie but you can never lie to yourself. You will always know the truth and judgment is only fair when it there’s truth…the real truth.

I can only wish all this mental torture would end but since I know far too well it won’t, I am determined to accept it as what it is and just smile and shrugged it off.

Bak kata my friend, “kalau awak make sure diaorg masuk syurga pun belum tentu diaorg akan maafkan awak”…..i know babe….and I can only pray….give some solace to their heart like I have in mine…