Dreams

I was so damn sleepy at the office …tried to brush it off with tea but no luck….and coffee will just make me feel sick! Seriously! So lets mengular di alam maya kejap.

Anyway….lately, I’ve been having weird dreams. Most of the time, I don’t have any dreams! (even if I did, I won’t remember them at all in the morning). 

But lately I’ve been having weird dreams (and remember them well enough!)…. My latest weird dream would be the one I had few nights ago. 

So in it, I was at a resort. I was lazing around at the balcony of our room (can’t remember who I am with though)….when I suddenly saw a big blue whale swimming towards the beach. Suddenly the beach dried up, leaving the whale on the sand. Luckily the whale is in some sort of a puddle and she is still breathing. Then a group of people came, (again, I don’t recognize any of them), then we (me included okay), then we tried to save the whale. We built some sort of pathway that fits the whale, then we just push the whale towards the sea through the pathway.  It’s a very hard work since the whale is very big…crazy big….but we did it. Watching her swimming in the ocean is the biggest satisfaction of all. 

I am still smiling because of that dream. Haha…….but why on earth am I dreaming about the blue whale? Crazyyyyy....

Itu semua ketentuan Ilahi

   

So lately I’ve been hearing whines from my single-super-marvelous friends about people asking them, “bila gik nak nikah tok?” or “pahal lom kawen?!” or the best thing would be, “iboh choosy gilak bah! Kawen gik sia!” …(stop being so choosy…get married already!)…

Huwau…..friends, I was in the same boat before. Persetankan mereka! (I am not sure what ‘Persetankan’ mean, but hey…it sounds right!).

I know someone who would say this each time someone ask that stupid, insensitive question to her, “tunggu makan hol kitak lok!” …rude and cruel but serves them right.

Never judge people! Never ask people when will they get marry and never ask married people when they will have a child. Never tell them not to wait too long. For all you know, they have been waiting their whole life and your stupid selfish question is the last thing they wanted to hear!

On the other hand, to my married friends, or to all my married-having-a-blast-just-have-kids-or-still-in-the-honeymoon-phase friends or my i-am-getting-married-soon friends, we are not better than our single-amazing-independent-strong friends. We could lose it all tomorrow and they can very well have it all tomorrow. Don’t judge. Don’t think that just because we did it earlier than them, we are wiser! (trust me…it doesn’t necessarily means we are!)

I wish I can give comfort to all of you. I really do. It’s hard. I know. I’ve been there. Felt that. All the time I can only smile faintly. What else can we do at that moment right?

Xpa. Hidup tok adil. Kita mungkin kurang di department A tapi kita lebih di department B. Kita mungkin miskin harta, tapi kita kaya budi pekerti.

p/s: god bless each and everyone of you. This Syawal I met so many amazing people! Wonderful people who shows me “biarlah kita miskin harta, tapi jangan miskin budi pekerti”… makin daif kehidupan seseorang, makin besar hatinya … makes me feels like betapa la kecik sebenarnya kita tok!

Life….

All of our troubles seem unimportant compared to others … others in the other part of the world. 

That makes me feel like any post I wrote seems so menial…so useless…

Didn’t dare to tackle the bigger issue…surely need more information before I even dare to share my opinion to the rest of the world. Sharing to friends and family require less … they can always correct you…and that’s how you will learn more. Post it here, and I will have people correcting me harshly, sometimes their opinion is more ridiculous than mine…the thing is, people who judge me the most, is people who are afraid to reveal their identity…scared much? The information is more acceptable if the resource person is reliable….an anonymous is not a reliable person. 

I met an Iraqi family yesterday. I couldn’t help but asking myself, how are they feeling? They are safe and sound here but back at their hometown, their family and friends are fighting for life…  I am too scared to ask them that though…

On the brighter side, we were chatting about labor and such and she told me that she gave birth to a healthy baby girl, weighing 4.5kg! How amazing is that? She did it naturally. I am sooooooooooooooo in awe with her when I heard that. She is no larger than me! haha 

Well I guess that’s how they live. They think about their suffering at back at their hometown but they didn’t let it drag them down. Some act on it, some pray, some give donation…there are thousand ways to help them…

Ooohhh…..which reminds me… I would like very much to invite you guys to sponsor a child. I did this with Islamic Relief Malaysia. I informed them my interest through their website, and then they sent me an email, telling me what to do. I fill in the form, make the first contribution.  Within one week they sent me a profile of my sponsored daughter! The feeling was amazing! Her name is Sundas Irfan. She has 5 siblings. She is currently living with her mom (her dad pass-away some time ago). It is my hope that with my little donation, she will get good food and education and then be able to help her family! Isn’t that amazing?! I never met her (and probably I never will) but when I get her picture, I cried (okay…I know I cry over everything! :P)… they said that we can send letters to them but I haven’t done that part…I am still too overly emotional. huhu

The website is http://islamic-relief.org.my/e-khairat/sponsor-a-child/

Do something….do anything! ;)

DILEMA AURAT WANITA ketika bersalin!

Haha…..have nothing much to talk about…..

Uhhh….i do

Do you know that it is WAJIB for a husband to find a female gynae for his wife? The priority-list should be: 

1. Muslim Female

2. Non Muslim Female

3. Muslim Male

4. Non Muslim Male

It is obvious I am not the best person to talk about this. Read one book and already I am an expert? Haha…. 

But I really want to share about it. I come across this book accidentally one day and just bought it without much thought….it’s just I never read it till recently….so the book I am mentioning is….. “ Dilema aurat wanita bersalin ketika bersalin” by Dr. Zaharudin Mohammad. 

It is just 191 pages …. RM19.00 at Popular….so people, go and get yours today.

Anyway, for you guys who are quite lazy to read (kekekeke…no offense)…keep in mind that your first priority should be finding a female OBGYN. A Muslimah. Sure, it is quite possible if you can afford private hospital. For us who can’t really afford it, all we have is the government hospital and we all know far too well how the system works there. Keep in mind that we can request for a female OBGYN in government hospital. It is our right. Unfortunately we have to fight for it.

In that precious book, there is a real-case when this wife got a male midwife and she fight for it (dah nak beranak ni…but she truly fights for it…) and suddenly they gave her a female midwife! After telling her there is no female midwife available bla bla bla…suddenly there is one pop up out of nowhere cuz she truly fights for it.

I mean of course not all of us can be that lucky…be it we fight for it or not. But my point is, we can request for a female midwife even in the government hospital. Write a letter, fight for it. Make sure your husband fight for it. 

Unless…unless it is truly a life or death question…(that’s why you need to read the book on your own…huhu).

It’s sad that we have to fight for it in this Islamic Country. 

I mean how embarrassing it is for us to expose us to the male doctor? 

We cover up our hair and body and suddenly we have to expose our MAHKOTA because we are pregnant?! 

We do have a choice…we do have female midwife somewhere…sure its not enough but we do…and if we look for them, we will find them…at least we try to find them! USAHA! 

With that, I rest my case… do wish we are more sensitive on this issue... do wish our leader do something on this… i wish it is not that easy for a male to be an OBGYN… I wish the system help our muslimah to at least have a female midwife without having to fight so very hard for it!

Hopes and dreams....

Hopes n dreams....I have none....
Crappy crap crap...
The truth is I do have hopes and dreams...
I just have to dig deeper to look for it...

Went to the office again today.
After 2 years, the case is still a nightmare to me...
When he said they have come to a decision...I said to myself,"is this how it felt when u r being convict?"

(2 guys just sat right next to me...and started to chat....I wish I have the nerve to say, "sir, I m not interested to hear your voice at all!..)

Anyway, back to the office...so yeap...I m being punished.... Punished for being ignorance. Forget about the fact that he forge my signature. Forget about the time when he came n bellowed that he should have the car. I couldnt make it clear enough that I don't want the car....I don't even want the dust from it!!! forget the fact that he stated that he badly wants that car n his dad can do so n so by talking to so n so...oh well....I do wish u get the car back. I seriously do. I know how much it icks you to loose the car...I know u far too well.

So hopes n dreams...I do have hopes n dreams...
I hope u get the car...
n whenever I dream of you, its my worst nightmare ever! Haha